Sunday, May 8, 2011
~ Family Tree..."
For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace. (Rom 6:14)
My life has not been an easy one. It has been filled with heart ache and heart break. It has seen death visit family and friends in the most devastating forms imaginable. It has taken from me children I will never hold on earth. It has taken the love of my life and turned it into a nightmare I could never have imagined. I have watched as people I called my friends spew harsh and ugly lies and innuendoes about me. I have witnessed the destruction of a family that I was once a part of with no real attempt made to salvage it. I have experienced the most ungodly acts from the most Godly people. The one thing I did not count on was that there would be a rescue made with such precision, that it would bring me to my knees and cause me to rejoice for all the pain that had come my way!
I enjoy the privilege of being a mother. In a few months I will be a grandmother for the first time. God has always had a plan for me. Whether it was to be a single mother, a hard-working secretary, a friend, a bride, a wife or the resident of the great state of Tennessee...it was HIS plan that has shaped me and molded me into who I have become. I am blessed beyond what I deserve.
Today, Mother's Day, is bitter sweet for me in many ways. Today I will miss my own mother and recall that this was the last holiday I spend with her. Today I will pray for a friend's mother who is in intensive care. Today will be the first time in five years that I will get to spend this day with three of my four children (which is definitely a bonus - there are great advantages to living in Pennsylvania!!!) Today also marks an anniversary. Four years ago I sat in a court room and watched as a judge terminated a vow taken almost twenty years earlier. A vow to love, to honor, to cherish, to care for...a vow that was not taken in haste and a vow I thought could withstand anything.
I praise God today that I do not fall under the law, but under grace. I praise God today that I am forgiven for any real or imagined transgressions I may or may not have committed. I praise God today that I have wonderful, beautiful and God-fearing people in my life who never cease to make me smile, or laugh when I want to cry. I praise God for the four beautiful children he has entrusted to me (and although some will tell you that my ex raised three beautiful daughters - they did not live in that empty house, they did not see nor do they know the true story of this mother's heart). I praise God for it all!
Whatever "cross" you've been selected to bear, bear it with praise! Know that whatever you have dealt with in life, it came to you through our Heavenly Father first! He truly does not give us more than we can bear, and that which does not destroy us brings us in closer union with Him. His grace IS sufficient! My family tree may have a few broken branches on it, but the gardener can and will mend them if allowed.
(My Mom - Millie - taken in the early 70's)