People tell me all the time that I am a "strong" person, yet, I do not see myself as such. They remark of the many trials I have faced over the years and confess that they "could never have survived" what I have. I do not view it in that light.
The inner me, the part that no one sees, has been crushed and battered for so long that the scars will never fade away. In the quiet recesses of my mind, when night comes, the memories come flooding back into view. One by one, I must take them and put them aside, asking God to remove them from my mind because they are too painful to bear. He has removed only one (and I remember asking Him to remove it because it was THAT painful, but I don't remember what it was - which was the point of asking in the first place). So, that scar has, in fact, faded.
The strength that comes to us that allows us to crawl out of bed every morning is a gift from God. In Him, we can find the strength and the courage to face another day. The challenges that we face, we do not face alone. We do nothing alone. Our own self-defeating and berating minds is our only obstacle. We rise through our failures by strength and continue our journey through strength - strength in His name, His word and His promises.
What others see in me, the "strong" person that they have come to believe I am, is not mine to brag about - it is the Lord's strength they see. On my own, I am powerless, yet "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." (Phil 4:13).
