~ "that was the sound of my integrity walking out the door..."

May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope is in you. (Ps 25:21)

"Keep me safe from myself, Lord" is the prayer of the day. Sometimes our biggest obstacle is ourselves. We have that want and that need to be part of something bigger and better, and we head out in search of it without consulting God first. He may have something else for us, but we are so caught up in what we want and think we need that we don't even bother to pray about it. Our world revolves around our own happiness (whether we want to admit it or not). There's a saying that "if mom's not happy, no one is" that hangs in a friend's kitchen. We could all apply that to our immediate needs. When we want something and don't get it, we tell others we are just "disappointed". I'm continually disappointed - in myself! I strive to be a good woman, a good mother, a good friend but mostly a good Christian. Some days are harder than other. Somedays I can't see beyond the end of my kitchen table.

But God gives us the opportunity to be his in all we do. He tells us that we belong and that all our suffering is not in vain. He will reward us in his time. If we let go of our integrity and give in to what is of the world, we will fail, and fall and become bruised and battered, not to mention, we'll be miserable. Summoning the courage to be strong in his word is not always easy. Sometimes it takes every ounce of our emotional stability to get through it. But in the end, when we have successfully completed our task, we can breathe a sigh of relief and know that we are still walking in his will.

Until that time comes, continue to pray, continue to be his in all you do! He knows how hard it is, Jesus reminds him! The trappings of the earthly world will eventually fall away and all that will be left is you and God. Better to be disappointed now, for a short while, then miserable for all eternity.