An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren. (Prov 6:18-19)
When we entertain wicked or evil thoughts, we cannot be also praising His name. You cannot do good and evil at the same time...the bad always overshadows the good. The same is true for our fellow man, our companions and our children. When we look only at the negative (what they fail to do) - we cannot offer them praise (for what they do accomplish). If everything you've ever done has been ignored and the focus has always been placed on what you have failed to do - the message you receive is that you are worthless...that nothing you ever do will be good enough. In those instances, we can develop low self-esteem, and worse than that, we can fall into depression. There is also the chance that we will cease from doing anything positive, since we only gain attention for the negative.
Our constant battle within ourselves to flee from troublemaking, lying and creating conflict in the lives of others can be overcome. We can turn our own tables and eradicate the enemy's grip on us simply by turning to God. Constant focus on His triumphs as opposed to our own defeats can bring about a change that will help us to see that although we may be sinners, we aren't all those things we've been programmed to believe we are. There are certain "triggers" that cause us to react instead of walking away. Perhaps it would be a good idea to limit our interaction with those triggers (or even people). Sometimes we just need to call it a day.
Our hope lies in the cross. That is where all the guilty sins (real or implied, true or imagined) should be laid. The cross offers us the opportunity to ask for and be forgiven. Once we have laid them there, it's time to once again, walk the path chosen for us by God, not those around us bent on watching us fail or fall. Our success also lies at the cross. With Jesus' mighty hand in ours, we can accomplish that which we set out to do through prayer and devotion. We CAN move mountains. Our faith tells us that (as does God's word). When we finally come to the acceptance that the world around us does not dance to the tune of one, when we realize that all we truly have is Jesus - we can make a better, more enjoyable and practical journey - ending our lives and beginning our eternal reward with the words "well done".
Don't play the game anymore. Stop allowing yourself to be put down and discouraged. When you know you've done good - own it! When you know you've done wrong, own that too, ask forgiveness and move forward...but own it in your heart as well as your head. God knows both and He knows your motives.
Make your life one to be admired by others, make your path one to be walked in the company of the King, make your heart and your mind one that is pleasing to the Father.
