But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (Matt 6:15).
How many times have you heard someone say, or said yourself "I will never forgive them for that"? The expression "those who live by the sword will die by the sword" can be applied to this verse. We all sin, we all hurt other (intentionally and unintentionally). Most often it is the "unintentional" ones that we don't even realize we've done. Our emotions are as individual as we are. How we respond to offenses against us is also as individual as we are. Some we can brush off without any effort and there are those that we carry around and they can fester like a wound who's scab we continually pick at and refuse to let heal. In both cases, when it finally does, it leaves and ugly scar that is a constant reminder of the injury. Sometimes its the magnitude of the wound that leaves an ugly scar. In either case, it's there to constantly remind us of our injury.
Jesus tells us that unless we forgive those around us who have "trespassed", God will not forgive ours. Forgiveness doesn't come from a box with a curtain dangling in front of it, it comes from our Creator. It comes from our "repentance". When we are sorry, truly sorry for what it is we are seeking forgiveness for, we are told to present it to the person we have "wronged" and asked forgiveness. "But what if they refuse to forgive me" - I refer you to today's verse...
There are many people I've harmed over the years. Many have gone on to their graves "guilty" of some real or perceived atrocity in which I refused to offer forgiveness. There are some that I will never be able to ask forgiveness of as well. There are things I've said and done in my lifetime that I cannot take back. There are sins I've justified in my mind that have snowballed into greater problems than if I'd have just admitted them back when it all began. Some of them are over 40 years old. How do we ask forgiveness for those? What is it we have to do to be forgiven?
There are some who would say that we need to ask for forgiveness "no matter what". There's another step in Alcoholics Anonymous that reads: "Became willing to make amends to such people except when to do so would injure them or others." Causing more problems while lightening your own burden seems to be a bit selfish. I can't imagine that God wants us to hurt others in an attempt to secure forgiveness for a sin against someone who doesn't even know we've committed against them. Quietly, prayerfully and sincerely ask Jesus to carry your petition to the Father. Then, let it go. I know, easier said than done. We tend to torture ourselves (I do, anyway) with the sins of our past. We also tend to harbor resentments from it as well. More often than you can imagine, the "hurts" we've incurred (as well as the ones we've inflicted and can't seem to let go of) are not even recognized as such by the other party as having occurred. Again, our own emotional ties to those hurts hold us captive in their little chambers in our hearts and minds. Open the door and let them out. Send them on their way and know that you've been forgiven. Send them on their way and forgive the offender. Give them over to Jesus - let him take them from you and make more room in your heart for HIM!
Put the ghosts of your past in their proper place and receive the blessings from Almighty God that he so wants to pour out on you. Let this be the day you stop beating yourself up over an event that lasted all of 30 seconds decades ago. Forgiveness is yours for the asking - so ask!
