Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matt 6:34)
Projection, not anticipation, can be our biggest enemy. Anticipation is looking forward to a pleasurable event or experience. Projection is a prediction made by extrapolating from past observations. We tend to expect the same results as we've already experienced - be they disappointment, sorrow, grief or hurt. Faith in God changes all that. We know that with God, all things are possible. There is nothing impossible for him.
When you believe in the full power and authority that God yields, you realize that there is nothing to fear, nothing to worry about and nothing too hard for him! He holds our dreams and our needs, he hears our prayers and our praises. He wants only for us to come to him and serve him. It's not that difficult. It's a choice and an acceptance made from the depths of one's soul and is clearly heard above the screaming of the heart.
Don't let your past experiences with what you believe to be God punishing you get in the way of your devotion to him. Instead, focus on what it is you can do for him. What can you perform today that will bring you closer to the person you want to be for him. I assure you, no act is insignificant to God - he sees all and remembers all. Anticipate his acceptance of your sacrifice! Do not underestimate yourself. You can experience the same joy and devotion that many Christians do without giving up your "life". We still laugh, we still love, we still cry, we still work, we still give, and we still receive.
Ask Jesus to accept you just as you are. Ask him to change you and mold you into what it is God needs you to be. Call upon the Holy Spirit to enlighten and guide you. Begin you walk of anticipation and put the sins of your past to rest. Start today, start now! "Dear Lord, if you will have me, here I am."
